Protective (acts like a man)
They get into trouble and need to be bailed out
Cook and Movie Ruiner
To meet and talk about life in general with biblical worldview
Haven’t you heard…all the above!! Lol
Hunting or they need your truck.
Training and fitness advice
Borrow my trailer
Being there to just listen.
They have lust problems
When things are tough, other guys call me to just talk to, simply as that.
Looking for encouragement
Need a listening ear and snip of wisdom
Just to talk!
The Holy Spirit of God
Family/Marriage = 10
Work/Ministry = 19
Health = 3
I entered a new leadership position in my organization and God provided a Christian mentor to help me grow in that position, and for future steps in the administrative arena. God is good, all the time!
My wife was diagnosed with cancer in 2008. She was stage 4 and had a very short 3 month battle before it took her life. I was not prepared to be a father to a two year old all by myself. But God placed great people in my life through my church and had lots of help from my family.
In 1999 I followed the Lord’s leading in starting a ministry to men. I had no clue about how to get financial partners or even what to tell them so that they could get on board with what I was attempting to do. I sought the advice of my Father-in-law who was at that time a missionary with Trans World Radio and he walked me through some ideas on how to raise ministry partners.
Upon accepting a severance from work, I was left with no new job and then the process of attempting to find a new career was rather humbling.
How do you deal with an unknown health issue that is destroying you and the medical community can not give you a reason or a solution? Some said it was all in my head, go figure on that one. I had been dealing with this issue for about a year and my weight dropped below 100 pounds from my normal wt of 135. Our first son was born during that time and turned out to be a real blessing instead of a burden we could not handled at that time. We are so accustomed to modern medicine being able to cure our illnesses, but I realized that turning to the Lord as I had never had to do before was going to be required on this one. I was 28 at that time and I am now 72 while never being cured was able to manage Chrohns disease, remain employed and had two more sons. Thank the Lord for his mercy and guidance over the course of past 44 years.
How to trust God again with my life?
men’s ministry to widows and single mothers
understanding when prophecy exceeds the Word and the decrease power of Spiritual
Study agape love in depth
Involved in small group/men
Men’s support group
Discipline of Prayer
Having a mentor
Writing Scripture on my heart
YES 41% NO 59%
We do not have a formal written strategic plan. We do have an MOU with a ministry partner who partners with us in focusing on intentionally discipling men and group activities for men.
Pastor is making an effort, but we are not very close.
But we are working on it … men’s breakfast on February 6.
we have a class once a month with men and another with just women
Desperately needed for both men and women.
We’re building one. Thanks to our local MIM AD.
I am currently part of a Men’s Ministry Team at my church. But I feel like there is no set plan to disciple men or to get men involved except for softball or the safety team. I am not the leader of this ministry but I truly feel like something needs to change for the men to be discipled correctly.
But it could use some tweaking. It is nearly all intellectual and limited relational.
There have been some efforts, but I’m not aware of any strategic plan.
More so than any congregation we have been in before. Still getting it up and going. Three male pastoral staff have participated in the process and are now starting to disciple other leaders. Resources used that support the process (but ARE NOT the process by themselves!)include BetterMan and Every Man a Warrior. Understanding of the process comes from (re)THINK Disciplemaking.
Just this week, started Level Up for fathers and sons. This can point dads to BetterMan.
Been attending for three years and haven’t been contacted by men’s ministry.
Hope Church had a mentoring ministry up and running but it has been on hold for two years now including because of Covid. I personally think they could’ve done one on one mentoring especially in warmer weather if they had made that a priority.
several Mens Fraternity groups meeting.
Off and on. Mostly not.
Weekly Bible study
It’s a Thursday group called Band of Brothers
Several of our men are actively doing discipleship, especially those of us in Christian Service Brigade, where discipleship is built right in to what we do on a weekly basis. But overall as a church, quite sadly, there is no such strategic plan.
Just an hour ago, I was meeting with an adult man who is growing in Christ for discipleship. We talked about the meaning of “dying to self” (in 1st Cor. and in Hebrews. We also had a good time of prayer.
Not really. They focus on small groups for families mostly
The Pastor and Men ministry work hard at disciple men.
We meet together every 2weeks to fellowship,eat,study/GODS Word &/or a Mens Study, and pray!
It happens in some small groups but it is not a listed strategic plan.
We are in between years of offering 33 The Series But with a few young dad’s in the congregation. Looking to turn discipleship into an out reach tool to recruit dad’s and families from the neighborhood/community.
Mostly attend one of the annual conferences you host.
However, it has been difficult to get men to participate & engage.
most stuff are centered on woman, sadly. Now due to the Virus nothing is happening for either.
we have men’s breakfast Tuesday morning and have centered our discussion on our Soul and Spirit.
We have a one-year man-on-man (and woman-on-woman) discipleship “program” whereby a mentor gets together with a mentee and they read four books together in the context of developing a life-on-life, spiritual-mentoring or discipleship relationship.
We are a new church plant without a men’s ministry in place.
We are working on it. Our first step is to form a true men’s group. We are starting with Bible study, but we are trying to incorporate some outside activities to foster those relationships and lift each other up.
we have a huge leadership gap within this traditional church and at the root of it is the lack of intentional discipleship of our men. I’m entering my 12th month and while we have gone through a couple of the series 33 lessons but we need to have a better strategy moving fwd.
Meet with 15 to 17 a week with Biblical studies.
Other than sharing the Word consistently.
We have a Men’s Breakfast every Tuesday morning every week. It just started back last month due to COVID.
It has been long in coming, but there is one in place…when I last looked…a year ago.
A very weak men’s ministry collapsed two years ago and is defunct. The only thing for men is an excellent Saturday morning Men’s Bible study that attracts men from other churches plus a few states via zoom. The lay leader is the best I’ve ever experienced. But, church leadership does not seem to place great importance on a vibrant men’s ministry.
We work at it. There is a plan; but strategic? Probably not
Our director just started the first of 2020. He put together a great leadership team. We had one meeting and had great plans for 2020. Then Covid but inspite of this, he has made some headway.We have ongoing training and small groups, some virtual and some in person.
I’m working actively with our pastors now to change this! Great news!
A get-away weekend with my hubs!
Vacation to Europe
An obedient child.(14yr old teenage daughter)
I should be blessed that my sister gets admission in any good law university
This is tough for me as i can not think of one material thing I hope to get this Christmas! I do want my family safe and healthy, but I didn’t think you were speaking of those things. Sorry.
For our son to return to church and men’s group.
That my son and daughter in law would mend the relationship with my wife and I. We have done everything possible on our side. It’s only Christ who can heal it. It would be really nice to be together this Christmas Eve.
My oldest son has not spoken to me in 6yrs. It would be an awesome blessing if he would come back.
For my church to get back to the way it was before the virus
Fewer distractions and more quality time with my kids and grandkids.
Amazon gift card
to be fully and unconditional loved by my wife. to have my wife prioritize our marriage, and to simply spend time with her.
Ministry Resources, more books.
To hear from our children they have received Christ as their Lord and Savior!
a date night with my wife, no kids.
Apple HomePod mini.
Knowledge that this past year I yielded much fruit, helping to Pillage the line to Hell and populated the line to Heaven.
Perfect health with power.
That my family is healthy and safe.
salvation of a family member
Acceptance to the CPD.
Camping Trip with Son and Grandchildren
Time with grandchildren
To be able just to find a nice Christian lady for a mate
Uninterrupted time without electronics.
Good health to me and all my family. To see all of my adult kids being independent, self sufficient and thriving to be closer to Jesus Christ.
The blessing of peace and harmony throughout our family!
Gift of an experience with my family.
A blessing from our Lord
New study bible
If Jesus came
Not big importance for me to receive Christmas presents . I prefer to be one to get gifts for others that make them feel good. Gift I would like is for wife to really enjoy her job and be able to follow her greater passions
Salvation for my brothers and nephews.
A set of bass strings.
An all expense paid weekend getaway for my wife & I (without the kids)
The rapture happening would be a true blessing… even so come quickly Lord Jesus!
salvation for my family
3/8″ drive Milwaukee 12 volt ratchet
Staying on our budget!
A relationship with my sister and mother again.
It may seem selfish but cash to catch up. However, I always want more people to know the love of Christ. That is always a blessing.
Seeing continued 100% remission of my leukemia after my bone marrow biopsy on 10 December.
Donations for the orphanage I founded in 2013. We are building a kitchen so that they don’t have to cook on an open fire.
A healthy family.
A 9mm handgun.
materialistic answer: new mountain bike
realistic, true blessing answer: Scribe bible journal
Disability checks from having C-PTSD.
A good Christian book that I can read and study through.
a kind word of encouragement, praise and appreciation
Pandemic over and men meeting in person without masks
a complete cure for Covid -19 virus
a night or weekend away with only my wife
A Christmas skit written, produced, and performed by my grandkids.
This is hard to answer. I really try not to think much about gifts and want to give to others. But I still love to receive. This is always a battle. I have begun to cherish quiet moments with my wife. So perhaps a gift we could give each other would be to simply be intentional about letting go of obligations to be quiet together. Peace.
Disciplines of a Godly Man by Hughes
Tender Warrior by Stu Weber
My Father’s role in my life, other Men/Believers/Positive-Strong-Leaders I have encountered in my Life
Emulating other successful fathers who are following Biblical teachings about being a father.
Other men to mentor and pour into my life and the lives of other men
Authentic Manhood Series.
Dr James Dobson’s books
Watching my parents throughout their 64 years of marriage and service to family and for the Lord.
That amazing bestseller from that very handsome author, 52 Things Kids Need from a Dad.
Board of education applied to the seat of learning.
3 to 4 times a week.
At least three times a week.
At least several times per week
At least twice a day, excluding before meals
I did but have stopped for some reason
I find that most men don’t. How sad.
I know I should…and we used to in the early years of our marriage…but after 37 years together, I have, sadly, allowed prayer together to fall by the wayside. We still pray over meals, and we pray at the start of a long trip…but those are more perfunctory in nature and not what you are looking for here,
Any suggested resources that provide an outline, prayer prompts, etc. in which to follow?
This is the last thing we do in a day. Sometimes if one of us is out of town for whatever reason, we will pray over the phone. This helps us to keep centered on Christ both in our marriage and in our personal lives.
I lost my bride on February 5th of this year, and I prayed for her every day faithfully.
Something I have already been convicted about.
I’ve tried so many times. She’s saved, and I mean really saved. I’ve been told that my prayers are repetitious and have no power; no one has ever said that to me. So now, I let her do all the praying. I hate it, it makes me feel inferior.
Prayer has been the bond of our relationship and the guide for decisions.
For a long time we only prayed together occasionally and did not realize what we were missing. Compared to how I feel now after we pray I believe our prayer life was hindered by not praying together.
Yes I pray with my wife in the morning in the afternoon and at night.
Praying together makes your relationship with each other and God stronger. And if you are upset with each other, praying together helps you get over it.
Its the 1st thing we do, before getting out of bed 🙂
We pray at bedtime and when we wake up, and rarely miss both in one day.
I do believe husband and wife should be prayer partners. When 2 Christians are married, the “Fiery Darts” increase exponentially. But, so does the power of prayer by those 2 Christians partnered in prayer! Ain’t God grand!!!
Before she passed away in Feb. this year.
Makes a Big Difference when you do!
We swap turns praying before we go to sleep each night. This is a great practice but can get to be a tired routine.
Daily is the goal and some weeks it is attained. It is the most powerful part of our relationship.
We have started trying to set a time each day to pray no matter the circumstances(children, work,etc.) We have been able to be consistent in this a couple of days now and it’s showing both us how hard this is, but also how needed it is.
I should be doing a better job of this!
She’s not a Christian.
we pray EVERY am & PM it has galvanized our marriage..
Every Night I try to pray with her and my daughter.
I’ve done better leading this in the past and need to resume a more regular prayer time with my wife.
Need to pray more often with wife
I really need to start and I have no excuses. So this question convicts and challenges me to begin.
We’ve prayed at least daily from a year before we were married until now. I highly recommend it, what a great way to ground your marriage in Christ.
We pray directly for people in need. We pray for our country during this time of division. We do not pray daily together. We could do better.
Morning before we leave. Night before we sleep. Every day.
Would like to
Great question of men!
Your question reminds me that I need to and I will.
We are coming up on 50 wedding anniversary.
I wish i could say i pray with her daily. She deserves this. I’ve not led well in this area of our marriage. We both pray. We pray for each other and for the kids. We just don’t do a good job of praying with each other. I’ve got some work to do here.
Optional: Any thoughts or comments on the fact that this did or did not happen in your life, or what was said?
I wanted more than I got but dad lived it out in front of us
My HS Football coach both talked and modeled the message of what it meant to be a man. He wanted us to play and live our lives as though we were representing Christ and our family.
That talk helped me to set the right course for my life and more than 50 years later, it still guides me and is reinforced by leading of the Holy Spirit.
Yes and NO.. each gave tidbits, many gave so advice that was not good too!
My father was emotionally, physically, and mentally abusive. An uncle was sexually abusive. I was a messed up kid and abusive like i had learned. Other men in my junior high and high school years wanted little to do with me.
My dad died when I was 14. Though he was very active in my life we never had serious discussions. When he died there was not another man who stepped up to mentor me or should I say desired to mentor me. I think that all stems from how they were raised. Discipling, mentoring, pouring into another man’s life was not recognized as important.
My dad was a deacon, a dedicated husband and father. I guess he figured I would catch his example. A lot I did catch but there was a lot I wish I had been told. I think it would’ve saved me 20 years of being on the wrong path.
Not a Christian man as my mom was & is unsaved, and my dad never really shared his Faith.
My Grandfather always told me to be a man of honor. Honor God, Country and Family.
My father was my role model for being a man
Dad said, “God expects you to ‘act like a man’ (1 Cor 16:13). He expects you to be a gentleman at all times so mind your manners, mind your soul, and mind… your mind!”
Keep your promises. Be humble, try not to stumble.
The dean of my seminary discipled me for most of three years at his initiative
My dad never talked to me directly about being a man. He taught me how with his life!
I did not talk to my dad but had several men whom I spoke to all of them were strong men in the Word and they were my long term mentors,
My dad is too emotionally detached and weak to be able to speak to what it means to be a man. He is too selfish to understand what it means to guide and speak openly about feelings.
More fathers need to step up and be godly dads, husbands and watchmen.
Mostly did this by leading as an example . Character , strong work ethic, love for my mother!
My father was a man of action. He didn’t need to say much to get his point across. He showed by doing. The things that I learned from my dad that I still carry involve hard word, dedication, honesty, and a love of family. Unfortunately, God wasn’t a priority when I was a kid. I am glad to say that now my parents have found God and serve Him.
made me think I had to do everything on my own
I have to answer yes. One talked through. Many showed me. Not sure how intentional. But so important. Recently you guys talked about Herb Hodges and “Tally-Ho the Fox”. Herb mentored me in the early 90’s through a doctor friend he was mentoring. Great stuff. I am grateful for the men who intentionally have poured in to my life
Love the Lord your God with all your heart soul and mind.
I guess I just got it through watching my dad and other men in my life. I hope I learned the right lessons. Whether I put them into practice well – Ok another story. AJD
My Dad led by a great example. He may not have had a serious sit down, but at times he would comment on certain situations about doing the right thing.
Sadly no, however I had those conversations with my sons who are now adults.
At 11 years old, my dad gave me a definition for a Godly man that I still remember 11 years later.
A Godly man loves God and lives intentionally for His glory.
He lives his family, the church, and the lost sacrificially and selflessly.
He accepts responsibility, rejects passivity, leads courageously, and anticipate God’s great rewards.
God Bless Men’s Fraternity and Robert Lewis
My father always told me, you can become whatever you set your mind to achieve, very positive. However, my Dad never had a his biological father in his life. So he really did not know how to model being a Dad to me, his son. He also had minimal exposure to the church or dedicated Christian men in his life. So no, we never had deep conversations.
Not on a spiritual level, just that a man provides for his family, protects women, controls emotion, stuff like that.
Wish someone would have. My young man decisions could have been different.
My Father and Grandfather believed if a man worked and had a job he was a man. They went to church but did not understand God’s commands in Psalm 78:v5-8.I thank God, pastor-Adrian Rogers explained Ps 78, on BBN Radio. Pastors and Deacons,–wounded- No healing of hidden sins.LIKE>Peter Wept after Deny Jesus;Prodigal Son;Demon possessed man freed
I think it was more implied by watching how my father interacted with others as I was growing up.
My Father was a violent criminal and physically abusive. My idea of a man was skewed until my forties when I learned about Christ.
Not that I remember. My father traveled a lot in his job. Becoming a man was more facilitated by men in my adult life who disciples me.
My dad was a Christen man who always put the Lord first and taught me todo also
As I graduated High School and got ready to go into the United States Navy my Dad said just remember one thing son, it was the first time he called me son, “just do the right thing no matter what you do in life.” With 6yrs of active duty, 15yr law enforcement career and a 25yr marriage, he was right. A fathers guidance never fails.
The fact that it was never discussed had a major impact on my own perception of myself as a man. AS I came to understand who I am in Christ, I came to better understand who I am as a man.
he lead by example, however never talked directly about it
Would have been very helpful and beneficial.
it is much needed. even the Military help me but it is not like one on one communication.
While I was not talked to directly about this, my Dad lived it out as a faithful husband, loving father, grandfather, brother, uncle and cousin, good citizen, servant and friend to many, including strangers.
His manhood lived out was a model to follow, even if he didn’t talk directly about what it means.
Get a good job, date girls, get married. Its fuzzy beyond that.
I had to learn on my own over the course of years by watching good men.
Do not recall specifically a conversation, but it was demonstrated very well throughout growing up.
“Without Jesus your just another animal wandering this earth with selfish desires that are destructive. Real men, yield and follow Jesus while constructively helping others find the path to Him.”
Modeled by example more than an actually talk about the elements of manhood.
It says “you’re on your own to figure it out.”
That made it nearly impossible to have the conversation with my son which led to a tumultuous relationship
While a straightforward talk may have been optimal, my father lived his life in front of me in many ways that exemplified what it means to be a man.
My father and grandfathers didn’t really talk to me about what it was to be a man. I just saw what they did and how they overcame adversity and how they admitted their mistakes and how they learned from both positive and negative results and how they lived.
Dad was really never exposed to anything other than the idea that you work hard to provide for a family and keep your name clear/clean. He encouraged me to think and live well but we didn’t really have strategic conversations about manhood.
As head of the men’s ministry at Faith Landmarks Ministry from 2003 – 2011, I had opportunity to facilitate spiritual growth of the men involved in the men’s ministry
I love bringing men to Christ
I regret I not invested in more!
Not sure how many men I have discipled. Taught middle school boys Sunday school for 13 years. Taught men’s Sunday school about 6 years and co-Ed for 5 years. Also done some men’s groups on Sunday nights. Love to disciple men.
Youth Ministry, Prison Ministry, Evangelical Ministry, Mission Ministry, Sunday School, Bible Study, Men Ministry.
We have used Kenny Lucks materials for years to good effect
I’ve been discipling men and women since the mid-70’s.
Professionally working with men struggling with an addiction thus the number is higher after many years of work.
As a Cru Military staff member, spiritual-mentoring and discipleship is our “bread and butter” — Glory to God! 🙂
In ten years working with many different men’s ministry organizations, in groups and one-on-one.
Leading a men’s study and all six of the 33 Series.
Also when I’m talking with my son, sometimes the words just flow out.
I really think at all of them, because I talk to God at all times. God is my Rock
whenever the HOLY SPIRIT speaks to my heart.
when reading His Word
When I’m running
Whenever He wants to talk to me.
When I hear Him call to share, tell me of His will & plan or needs for me.
Any of the above, or during prayer.
you are going to laugh..when I now the lawn..my mind is in neutral & Holy Spirit
Throughout the day
when under duress and I am LISTENING
When in focused bible study
Sunday worship and preaching…
Leading up to a big decision.
God speaks to me in all these venues, I cannot choose one over another.
at the most unexpected times
Whenever and wherever God chooses.
randomly in life, often when least expected
I have heard him many places, including ALL of the Above.
Studying his word
When I am quiet and the world is quiet around me. when everyone is asleep
When I read the Bible out loud.
When His Word is opened.
*Betrayal: to lead astray; to deliver to an enemy by treachery; to fail or desert especially in a time of need; to reveal unintentionally; to disclose in violation of confidence.
By a fellow pastor
Had another believer divide a former church with rumors and legalism.
I always had a very good Christian relationship with my manager for 11 years. Then one day he had to let me go without any notice and apparently this decision was 1 year in the making. I felt that has my Christian brother he could of let me know in advance instead of sending me out during the Covid crisis. My faith has not wavered but this did make me doubt his faith as a fellow believer.
Minister who showed no interest in helping or following up, left me disappointed and wondering if care.
Christians can be very hurtful and selfish people.
To reveal unintentionally, to disclose in violation of confidence.
No comments about it. Learned to forgive and forget.
Many instances. Believers are susceptible to reverting to their old nature as well. Every case has been forgiven and we’ve moved on. I’m thankful for a Savior who allows me to be who I am in FULL truth and FULL love, and forgive my brothers and sisters who fail me and others. God is good!
My dad when I was a kid.
I can say that i’ve been disappointed many times but can’t think of a time when someone has betrayed me to the point of injury to my person or my witness.
Ex-wife had an affair that ended the marriage.
“All have sinned and come short of the Glory of GOD. Let he who has not sinned cast the first stone. Judge not, for the same judgement you judge with will be done unto you.”
Yes and it involved unsaved person who is confused
True Believers dont do this, and if they do, they Repent!
A church member for 20 years run off by pastor and still a member a year later but no one misses or seems to care you’re gone, or want to know Why.
We were lied about by parishioners.
While not betrayed, my family has recently experienced “abandonment” by another family whose wife (but not husband) is a believer. We have known this family for 10 years and the oldest of their six kids was my son’s best friend. We were invested in their kids and have many fond memories. I felt that we could reach the husband spiritually in hopes he would make the decision to accept Christ. Unfortunately, an unresolved conflict escalated and the parents no longer want us part of their lives.
I have also betrayed other believers in terms of not extending them the grace they deserve, sewing seeds of discontent, unrest and dissent, and other things that work against unity in the body of believers.
Shaped my life – still impacts my relationship with those in authority. By God’s grace, He is healing the brokenness so that I can trust.
Yes but I have ALSO BEEN the Betrayer!!
Not in devastating fashion to where I was left despondent for a long period of time.
And could not get a straight answer as to why when he was questioned, nor an admission of guilt.
First Time. I was 19 and mid age married man with children invited me out for hamburger. He took me to sinful massage parlor. Next Time. I was in my 40’s. After revival in our church, I talked to pastor of my sin problems. Pastor said go find some men to pray with me. Men were not interested in praying about my sin problem. Next. I was interviewed by staff pastor. I told him of my sin and marriage problems. staff pastor said “Sir, you will never do anything in this church.”
scripture tells us to be Christ like; Extend the Grace of God by giving the other believer a chance in private to stand accountable, seek forgiveness which by we can reconcile.
Middle son at 16 share with the Youth Pastor that he struggled with Lust (Really? 16) Youth Pastor told Senior Pastor that told his step daughter which told my Son she was told to stay away from him. Son left the Church, he knows Christ but doesn’t live for him. When he attends special days with his Mom and I he sucks snot the whole service. Church in his opinion is a bunch of hypocrites.
Colleague threw me under the bus,to self-promote himself,and advance himself with status. Hurt quite a bit,but forgave him,and today we are still friends and both Men of God
In his decision,I was lifted up by our Lord to another location,with highest salary of my career,and retired from that new location because of God’d Blessing.How Great is Our God !!!
One of my Christian brothers said he was going to help in a time of job loss and never followed through.
Disappointment in another believer, yes, but not to the level of betrayal.
Micah 6:8 – He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.
Knowing that God is the head of your family and your life to knowing that he is always ready to get you out of the mist of temptations because when we all sin the Holy Spirit convicts us all and allows us to not looking back in our rear view mirrors and run away as fast as you can and let your eyes look forward ahead . Jesus Christ loves us all
Let this mind be in you that was also in CHRIST JESUS who being in the form of GOD, thought it not robbery to be equal with GOD, but made himself of no reputation and took upon Himself the form of a servant but was made in the likeness of man; being formed and fashioned as a men, He humbled Himself and became obedient unto death.
Someone who has a strong relationship with God, his family and is willing to sacrifice his time for the benefit of others.
Godly, dedicated, loyal, committed
Prays the Word
Godliness or Promise Keeper
True in word and deed.
of noble character
Colossians 1 verse 7 As you learned from Epaphras our dear and faithful minister of Christ on your behalf 8 who also declared to us your love in the Spirit
Discipler (Matthew 28:19-20)
The man/woman who responds in faith versus fear is faithful. As Joshua and Caleb were the only 2 of the 12 spies to put their faith fully in the Lord and advised the people to move across the Jordan and take the land as God had directed. When we actually trust our lives to Christ by action we are faithful.
A Godly Man
Be there always
1 Timothy 3:2,Titus 1:6
PERSISTENTLY PURSUING CHRISTLIKENESS.
Man of Integrity
a man of integrity
Man of Character and Integrity !
Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong. Let all that you do be done in love.
(1 Cor. 16:13-14, ESV)
A Fellow Servant of Christ
But if serving the LORD seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your ancestors served beyond the Euphrates, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the LORD.”
Righteous, upstanding, redeemed
one who stays on task, stays the course
A man of consistent integrity before God and man.
“No soldier gets entangled in civilian pursuits, since his aim is to please the one who enlisted him.”
2 Timothy 2:4 ESV
I know this is from the same passage, but this is the best description I know. To be faithful requires desperately clinging to God, disciplined submission, and a denial of other pursuits. In other words, a good soldier.
Dependable man of honor.
“He follows my decrees and faithfully keeps my laws. That man is righteous; he will surely live, declares the Sovereign Lord.”
Ezekiel 18:9 NIV
obedient to the Word
Devoted to God and Family.
Totally sold out to God!
discerner of God’s will
obedient to the Lord’s command
a man of valor
Invests eternally (33 Series)
How can a man be faithful if he is not AVAILABLE?
(Trustworthy, reliable, convicted).
Man of conviction based on the word of God
One who is grounded by and in Kingdom focus.
A person of integrity
True follower of Christ.
Godly teachers reside in the shadow with every step.
Motivated to reveal “the Kingdom of God” here on earth and invite others to partake!
(that is God’s call to all believers)
1 Timothy 4:7-16. Believers.
Reliable, steadfast, unwavering to our commitment to our Father(as a servant king)
One who is righteous with and serves his wife, family, friends, and God; and his church. One who learns from other Christians and teaches future disciples.
Father, it is a word that is that is not only used as a teacher, but as a provider, a protector and a faith leader. If we have more men step up to become fathers, we will see His work done.
Present, physically, emotionally & spiritually for his God, family and friends
Personal Prayer, accountability partner
Divine Defense by Dr. Robert Jeffress
Weekly mens accountable meeting outside local church
Disciplines Of A Godly Man by R. Kent Hughes
Covenant Eyes accountability
David by Chuck Swindoll
Robert Lewis Original Manhood Series.
Train yourself to be Godly: a 40 day journey toward sexual wholeness by Clifton
Directed prayer; Praying the scriptures.
having other men holding me accountable
Stepping up (family life)
Holy Spirit conviction and help
Wild at Heart by John Eldredge
Nathan Project FMO Groups and teachings
Maximized manhood. Edwin Louis Cole
Unwanted by Jay Stringer
personal accountability partner AND men’s small group
Fathered by God
Mortification of Sin by John Owen
A resilient life by Gordon Macdonald
My “wise guys” men’s group
The Holy Scriptures, constant communication with my Abba Father as well as an accountability group of godly men. I have found that sins of omission comes before sins on commission.
Bear Clifton is the author
Men’s small group
Directed prayer; Praying the scriptures.
The Proven Men Daily workbook is a good tool to help you draw closer to God for a heart changing experience.
By the grace of a God, I avoided many traps of sexual sin. However, I have witnessed many friends, relatives, coworkers, and others pay too high a price for it. At some point in time it is like a thirsty man paying $10,000 for his favorite drink when a glass of pure, clean and cool water is offered for free. I shutter to think how easily I could have ruined my life with one action that I avoided countless times. Only the hand of the Lord on my shoulder can explain.
More than sexual purity it focuses on purity of heart in general. A great overall study but you must be prepared to be honest with yourself.
My biggest resources has been my relationships within my church. My community group and a few men at my church that I trust have been a safe space for me to confess and receive encouragement as I struggle and strive to follow Christ in regards to this area of my life.
Opening up my conversation in last couple decades with men and women- including my wife- from small groups to one on one- and my 12 step sponsor.
Most books and resources are overly focused on behavior modification and not the root causes of unwanted sexual behavior that help us understand and believe the gospel better. Unwanted is a book/approach that focuses on heart issues, dealing with pain from your past and a pathway to wholeness in Christ.
Also “Setting Captives Free: The Way of Purity” by Mike Cleveland
We are currently going thru 33 the series volume 3
I have read Proven Men
I am also reading some material from John Eldridge right now Fathered by God
YES 63% NO 37%
Given my past challenges with pornography, I knew I had to be honest with my wife prior to our marriage. I did to honor her with honesty, but also to have accountability and prayer from her.
Yes. We’ve been married for over 20 years and have discussed this issue many times.
Yes, I disclosed in a general way prior to going away for treatment. A full disclosure was done in treatment to give my wife the information she needed in order to make an informed decision as to whether or not she wanted to stay married to me. The good news is she saw the change that was taking place within me and chose to stay married to me.
I think she has suspicions but doesn’t say anything.
Good timing! God delivered me from porn over a year ago I had never revealed my struggle to my wife until Sunday 9/13/20. It was through many tears I finally confessed to her after watching a sermon together that morning from Grant Ethridge at liberty live in Hampton. My confession was met with pure grace even after I told her I had struggled for years. She said she noticed a change in me over the last month. Remarkably, that’s about how long I have been praying and reading God’s Word.
That yes comes with a qualifier. I don’t tell her everything because she would freak out. I do not have the moral innocence she has so i keep it very general.
Both of my wives knew/know and it helps me resist temptation. The battle isn’t as fierce as it once was. It’s like confessing sin before the Lord, the Holy Spirit steps in to do His sanctifying work.
P.S. Secret or unconfessed sin is unforgiven sin.
At my age there is no battle for sexual integrity going on. Just glad to be here.
She knows the struggle exists, but is not burdened by the gross details of it. There is a fine line between revealing a struggle in this area with our wives, and creating undue insecurity and anxiety by getting too specific. Perhaps the location of this line varies from marriage to marriage, while exercising discretion and wisdom.
I think she knows it is a battle, but not how hard the battle is some times.
It’s been incredibly helpful, especially when choosing TV shows to be on the same page on what I need to avoid.
Although she is aware of safeguards I have in place.
I freely discuss with my wife about the availability and in your face internet porn because we have three sons and three grandsons. It is interesting that decades ago I could not get her motivated until I sat down and showed her what was there and how easy and free access there was. She was very motivated then to do our best to guard our sons. Tony Blair when he was PM of the UK had a great suggestion. Instead of free access, block all Porn unless you request access and go on public record!
But lacks understanding (or does not want to know) of how it impacts me physically, emotionally, and mentally.
Maybe you should define sexual integrity
Yes. We have discussed porn usage. She is aware that sex and lust is a struggle that I deal with.
My wife is everything I want sexually, but sometimes she doesn’t understand how well certain things she does pleases me.
I’ve been upfront with my wife with my struggles and when I fall into temptation. I told my pastor I tell her everything and he didn’t like that. Saying she would second guess me all the time. Well that’s not the case. I once lied to her about telling my dad that I got a speeding ticket. When I confessed I didn’t tell him she broke up with me saying if I could lie about that what else could I lie about. When I started to have feelings for a co worker I told her and stopped it.
I wish my wife cared honestly
There is no imminent battle but there is always an ongoing tussle with the enemy of my soul to misguide my thoughts. Purity and integrity toward my wife is paramount in my sacred union with my life-long, God-given, partner and help-meet. I have found a “GOOD THING!”
No battle for sexual integrity exists.
We talk about my needs vs her needs and how I have different needs then her around sex.
She is aware of past sexual sin but is not fully aware of the ongoing struggle.
She helps me put certain restrictions in place as needed in our home (i.e. hide tablets, only on computer when she is in the room, change password for access to screen as needed). While she is aware of it, since it is a painful subject for her, she tends to avoid checking on me or how I am doing. I try to check in with her from time to time to let her know where I am, and how things are going.
She struggles understanding it though
She was/is my accountability partner:
- in past when I became aware on the challenges of dealing with such temptation in the past.
- is now, as a prayer partner and as part of the solution that keeps me accountable and focused on a life in Christ. Because of this the challenge is easy to deal with now = thank you Jesus!
We are engaged, but she knows, as I also lead a Men’s group around this
She knows of my struggles, but I choose to discuss them with an accountability person. She is in menopause and sometimes it is difficult for her to discuss and hear about it. But she is always in prayer for me and my struggles.
It’s not a subject you casually talk about with your wife. Hey hun, I just saw a really beautiful woman at the grocery store, please pray for me! I think we as men are better encouraged by talking with other men about our struggles.
Every man with a pulse is dealing with sexual integrity at some level. Most won’t admit it to themselves and won’t talk to anyone about it due to shame.
We have an agreement of how, what and when I share. When tempted or the battle escalates and I need help from brothers I do that as part of our plan. If I intentionally look for and use porn I talk with my brothers but I also share with her. We are in agreement as to what the consequence is to my looking or acting out. We do not wonder what we should do. We have an action plan. This eliminates a level of argument and fear of discovery and disclosure. It works better than hoping it works out.
Yes. And being raised in a house with no brothers then raising sons, she was a bit shocked by how guys struggle with sexual temptation. This has prompted some great conversations.
We’ve discussed the fact that men are very visually stimulated.
I let her know about my struggles and how I may fall or come close to falling. I think transparency is important in the relationship. She appreciates my honesty and it breeds more intimacy.
Even at the age of 73 it is a struggle but have it under control. Wife understands.
But only generally. Specific issues are reserved for my ‘inner circle’ of brothers.
My wife is my accountability partner.
Because there is no battle
I am single. However, I would love for you guys to do a podcast series on how a man finds and pursues a woman for marriage. Also, a podcast explaining how a man knows he is ready for marriage. Thanks!
My wife is wise in many ways and in this area she understands that the battle for sexual integrity is real and she is willing to talk about it and hold me accountable. I appreciate this tremendously – that she understands it is a real struggle and that she is a God-given partner to help me in the struggle.
Years ago I went through “ Every Mans Battle.” This book taught me and my wife about the sexual struggles of a man.
I am very open with my wife. After an event put on by Noble Warriors many years ago, I chose to give all of me to my wife and it has brought us even closer.
my paraphrase: Some men’s sins are apparent in this life for all to see, and some men’s sins are hidden in this life but will be revealed when they stand before God.
2 Peter 19: “They promise them freedom, while they themselves are slaves of depravity – for a man is a slave to whatever has mastered him”.
2 chron 16:9
Proverbs 3:16 in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
2 Corinthians 10:5
1 Thessalonians 4:3-8 has been the most impactful and memorable verses for me when I wrestle with sexual integrity.
Proverbs 5 and 6
New American Standard Bible
8 Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is [a]lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, [b]dwell on these things.
2 Corinthians 5:9
I friend who I have invited to get into my business whenever he feels the need, and I into his business. We have a list of questions we can use. The last question is “Have you been completely truthful in these answers?”.
1 Corinthians 10:13 No temptation[a] has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted[b] beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted,[c] he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.
1 Corinthians 10:13
No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.
Genesis 2:24 and Matthew 19:6. God’s intent is not ambiguous or unclear. Fidelity is not a nice to have but a must and the only alternative lifestyle is singleness.
Psalm 119:9-11 I continue to struggle here and do not believe it will ever go away.
Galatians 2:20 I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body I live by faith in the Son of God, who loves me and gave himself for me.
Shared with pastor, friends who were believers. I was molested at 7 or 8 by an older(12) cousin. Saw magazine of my older cousin. Molested again from about 12-16. Purchase a gay mag through the mail around 18 or 19.
Went back to in my 20’s porno online. Struggle with sex, adultery Thank God I got free. Challenged within in the context of church when sex is associated with jokes especially homosexuality. process of identifying with Christ support of my wife/brothers who didn’t judge.
Not totally but substantially
I am not ashamed to share as men need to hear they are not alone in their quest…
First shared it in a purity group across town. Then I shared it in a men’s prayer meeting at MY church. That sharing led to a connection to a man who also was committed to purity. We started the purity group at our church and 14 years later its still going strong. God orchestrated the whole thing.
in this world now there is so much that is not pure, even people who claim Jesus but still live in this corrupt world, it is a struggle daily
I share it on a monthly basis one on one and with groups.
It is something to consider doing more than once. First to make sure you have an accountability brother to keep you on your promises. Second, to give testimony at men’s events to help others gain courage to get help, seek Christ and find the path.
A close friend and mentor
In my church’s men’s small group.
Men’s group. Close friends.
With a close friend and in a small group.
With my small group.
With a counselor and with a brother with similar struggles.
I started a men’s group at church called F.I.G.H.T. Club. It stands for Fighting Immorality with God’s Heavenly Truths. I have since relocated and changed churches, but I still participate remotely in the group as a member.
My Wife, My Battle Buddies, Covenant Eye’s is a Great Tool
In men’s group
Being open and real is always best!
Our theme on The Noble Man Podcast for September is Living with Sexual Integrity. Most guys have a story of their first exposure to pornography. We’d love to know your age and your story if you’re open to sharing.
When I was 8 years old I found a discarded Playboy magazine.
playboy and hustler mag’s in house where I was baby sitting in TV room = not a good thing for any household.
Very minimally (a one-time event) via a book evidently known by neighborhood kids in a clump of trees where we rode BMX bikes.
not until as a married pastor did we get the internet. It certainly had some bad things pop up when searching for some information.
My story is at https://youtu.be/BFUWuJrD6Q8
Buddy’s dad’s stash of Playboy’s, Penthouse and some x rated movies.
Not exactly sure, but the sin habit began freshman year of high school
Racy magazines at subway train station.
Introduced to porn by my cousin while we were working on his grandad’s tobacco farm through “detective magazines.” Those magazines had some every risque stories.
Playboy by my father who was down playing it in a teaching moment be thought… Which I think worked for me…
My older sister found one of my mother’s pornographic tapes and showed it to me, when I was 5. This is how I learned what sex is.
My first apartment after college and I discovered boxes of PB magazines left by the landlord. I was far from home (TX to NY) and alone.
Magazines found by accident in a recycle barn
My mom was a baker and would make special order playboy centerfold cakes. My parents always had several playboy or penthouse mags around in an end table or in a magazine rack. I was not prohibited from looking at them.
Discovering magazines in the house belonging to my uncle and my dad.
Found magazines out in woods and was very attracted to it. Kept coming back to see it.
Found a magazine lying in the street on my way to a kids group meeting after school.
Neighbor showed me his playboy when I was 9, and was hooked for life. Now been sober for about 6 years – it’s a powerful and demoralizing addiction
Penthouse magazine laying around the house. Have struggled with pornography on and off every since. A constant battle
Jr. High, guys on the school bus had playing cards with pictures of naked women on them. About that same time, I found a Playboy in my older brother’s desk.
My uncle had hidden a pornographic magazine in his bedroom closet. He was only ten years older than me, so he still lived with my grandparents at the time. I happened across it one day while I was over at their house.
Someone threw a magazine out by our mailbox.
Dad was given a playboy magazine for his 40th Birthday party. He hid it in the basement trashcan where I found it throwing some things out.
My uncle, a contractor, had pictures of women hung up in the storage cabinets of his garage.
Playboy back in the day
Sadly, it was from a pastor’s son. He was giving out free magazines (pre-internet) to guys in middle school, and then selling them after that… like a drug dealer. It began a long stretch of distrust in the church.
Magazines in friends dads houses.
please be cautious as to how you handle the answers to this question. For men over the age let’s say of 45 exposure might mean actually seeing something with the intent of looking. To a 16 year old in today’ internet/TV world he has been exposed without fail by 10 if he breathes. Computer error, commercials..
saw a Playboy magazine
Magazine buried in backyard. Neighborhood “friend”
Saw some girlie magazines
I read Playboy magazines in the gun shop with Air National Guard. I read the journalism, and peaked at the pictures.
It was like a drug to me. I couldn’t believe that such a thing existed, and I wanted more.
Older brothers had magazines hidden between the bed mattresses that I inadvertently discovered at a very young age.
A guy at school had dirty pictures he kept in his wallet. He showed me at lunch time.
Dads nasty magazines
Thank the Lord for a faithful father who prepared me to “don’t try to fight it, RUN!”
My dad wisely told me that when I came in contact with porn to run away and never look back. He then proceeded to tell me about men in our family who’s lives were destroyed by sexual sin. Needless to say, I am blessed to have had the dad I did and thus have been able to tell my wife that there are no sexually impure skeletons in my proverbial closet. Praise God! I couldn’t have done it alone.
Brother came home from college… first computer in the house. Discovered it on his computer playing other games.
It ruined my life and set me up for decades of struggle, guilt, and addiction.
My parents had the Playboy channel when I was a kid in the 80’s. The shows wouldn’t start until 7pm and my parents would kick us out at about 6:30 or right after dinner so that they could watch it. Unfortunately, the way the house was set up, we could see the tv from my sisters bedroom window, so she would leave her curtains open and they all the neighborhood kids would come over and we would watch it.
My cousin had some magazines in his room
My dad’s office had pictures of naked girls on desks and calendars. we, as a family, were taken there to make some extra money by cleaning and organizing. My 9-year-old sister made light of the pics. I was amazed.
Found playboy and hustler under the bed in the spare bedroom at my aunt and uncles house. A couple big boxes of them. This was back in the early seventies .
Boy scouts would overnight at military base.
Nothing during COVID-19
Guidance in counseling sort of
Mens Ministry – Church Chair Team
Jail Mentor, AWANA, Royal Ranger
Compuer & Telecom team
Para-church organization like Noble Warriors
Troubled young adults with bad histories/addictions, etc.
Ministry to Men Leader Local,State and at Times National Level
Food pantry driver/5-10 hrs weekly
lead a mens bible study
Sanitation team leader
Military Ministry Director
Celebrate Recovery sr. leader & discipler
Men’s Ministry Director
Trustee/oversee church building and property
Studying Christian Ministries and Pastoral Care at Regent U.
Raising a 5 yr old, caring for my Mom, running a business, remodeling the house,
Midweek gatherings(Life Groups)
Write a daily devotion that goes to over 130 leaders each weekday.
Men’s Group Leadership Team/Support various ministries
Regional Ministry Director
as a janitor
worked at a concert amphitheater
Worked in a small Jewish Mom & pop drygoods store during Jr&SR year of high school. I was 16 & 17 and needed to work closely, learn from a good man who held my feet to the fire, so to speak. It definitely was a God thing for me. I heard that we said I was the best worker he had had up to that point. I stayed in touch till he retired and moved.
Grocery Bag Boy
Marina deck hand
Spiegel Catalog Center Shipping Department.
Janitor and general maintenance at a furniture store. 15 years old and rode my bike to get there. To get the job I walked in and introduced myself, then proved I had what it took.
Jonbil Mfg. Co.
Working at the YMCA as a camp counselor
Newspaper carrier at the age of 12. 90 customers.
Funeral Home Assistant part-time evenings and weekends, 16 y.o. Duties included but not limited to open doors and escort to repose rooms, assisted on removals, once drove the hearse in a funeral, crematorium run, filler urns, cleaned toilets, vacuumed and dusted, wash fleet cars, assistant at chapel and grave, logged in flowers, valet. Great Job!
Summer job as a high school general laborer for the county Park and Planning Commission trimming bushes, mowing grass, cleaning azalea beds, and working in the plant nursery hot house.
Grocery store clerk
I was a labor in a can fabrication Factory in Philadelphia PA. 1978
Helping a neighbor on his farm, hoeing and harvesting cantelopes.
Wendy’s Crew Member
Mowing the family lawn every week. I was paid room and board! But if you mean outside the home, I got a job when I was in high school as a sticker and truck loader at a local swimming pool supply store.
Picked up trash & cut grass at a theme park
working on a farm and cutting grass
Stocking at a grocery store
Helping the janitor at my local school.
raking leaves, cleaning yards, cutting grass and shoveling snow for the older neighbors within 1-2 miles of my childhood home.
Working in a gas station
Slinging Hay from a baler to a trailer and then into a hay loft at age 15.
Cut the grass at home.
ist job was detasseling corn in Illinois at 15yrs-old,$1.50 per hour,or weeding soy bean fields by hand using a hoe. Out of college w/degree;Teaching Practical mathematics,PE/Health,Track/Football Coach w/extra one month pay
Stock clerk/Bagger at BE-LO Markets
Bus boy at a local restaurant
mowing grass for 2.00 each. Made my first car’s insurance.
Working for a paint contractor
newspaper boy at 12
For my dads company doing computers
clothing store where my entire family has worked at one time or another
Masonry Helper with my father.
I was 16 when I got a job at A&P grocery store as a cashier in the spring of 1986. A&P changed it’s name to Super Fresh that same year. I left shortly after. In those days every item had a little stick on price tag and it was manually entered into the register kind of like a calculator. I hated it when people got in my line with super full carts
Worked at Kroger grocery in Pittsburgh
Worked at a bakery as bread maker. Shop made sub rolls for local sub shops.
Bus boy at shoneys
I worked as a clerk/ general merchandiser for a regional grocery chain
My first job was a dishwasher for a company called TWM Food Services Inc. in a historical black college named Virginia Union University.
Work on a Construction site with my dad
Serving as a 2d LT in the US Army at Ft Bragg, NC – HOOAH!!
Dishwasher at Pizza Hut, age 15 with a work permit
Mowing a cemetery lawn
Night shift dishwasher
To glorify God
I started with my father, Garnett George, in 1971, two days after I graduated High School and I’ve been there ever since.
Spreading top soil and mowing grass as a teenager
Dairy farm hand ! Best job I ever had.$1. Per day! Made me a hard worker! I’m a 45 yr small business owner in recreation that has been very successful. Announced My retirement today for 2022. Going to help more @ church & relax on my horse farm with my family. I’m blessed all my children& grandkids live within a five mile radius. God Bless!
Taking trash out for the post office. I got paid every three months. It was fun job.
Grocery cart pusher at age 12
Delivering clothes from the car of a clothing cleaner and presser.
High School Industrial Arts Teacher
My 1st full time job was a steel worker.
Clerk in a grocery store included stocking shelves, waiting on customers and assisting deliveries.
Inventory at western auto in San Antonio Texas
Janitor in middle school/ high school
At age 16, I got up 6 AM to milk cows when Dad was gone from home working. At 19 I worked part time typing shipping papers for trucking company about $3.85/ hr. At 20 I was private in U.S. Army $325/ per month. At 25 I was Electrical Engineer at $1000/month.
Moving irrigation pipes in fields on a farm
Stocking the liqueur store shelves at night
Working at Styles Bi Rite for 75 cents an hour back in the day!!
House keeping / Janitor at Kenner Army Hospital Fort Lee, Va age 17
Selling Grit newspaper and delivering on my bike. Loved it, bringing it to the customers was fun. Got paid too!
Cutting grass and building overpasses on I 45 in Louisiana
Paper boy route.
Delivering news papers on Long Island NY
working in a shipyard
US Army. 17 years old.
My first job out of high school was working in a factory that made metal siding and roofing for barns and other types of buildings for farm use or for factories. we also made the trim pieces too.
Associate at KMart
Usher at a movie theatre
shoe salesman at Athletes Foot
Hardware store salesman at 16 years old.
Auto repair shop LOF change guy, open/close shop, clean-up, customer ride-share, parts run guy.
selling popcorn and candy at a movie theater.
Working soda bar at age 15 1/2
Washington Post. Newspaper Route.
1st job: paper boy 2nd job: dishwasher are restaurant
Mowing lawns – age 9
Dishwasher at a restaurant (15 Years old)
Working at a Nursing Home.
First “job” was cutting grass during summer. My first legal job was McDonald’s.
Sales Associate at Dollar General
Off of farm was McDonald’s. Still had to rack hay though
Grocery store bagger
Sports Complex/Driving Range/Batting Cage Attendant
Not many options in early 1960s for young teens:pre-teens. Bought older brothers paper route for $2.00 per customer. Caddied at local country club. Carried 2 bags for 18 holes for $4.50 plus $1.50 tip for 4 hours. Do the math. Minimum wage when I finally got a job as a stock boy/jack of no trades at flooring company was $1.25 an hour.
Clerical/filing/handyman work around my father’s law office
Working for my father who was a builder.
Washing dishes in a hospital kitchen, serving patients their meals and picking up the dishes/trays afterwards.
I was a custodian cleaning a school.
Summer camp counselor
Working in the summer in the harvesting of tobacco.
Building piers and docks
Engineering Technician for a Structural Engineering firm.
Work at a full service gas station
Pushing the lawn mower to and from a yard in the neighborhood for my older brother.
1st adult job was enlistment in United States Air Force at 19 years of age.
Paper Boy (local paper, 2x/week, pay = 3 cents?/paper) First “real” job = Janitorial services, minimum wage
Bagging groceries at a Midwest food chain
picking tomatoes on a farm..age 8
My first job was working as a bagger for Food Lion
Working at McDonalds at 15 to save money for a trip to France
Tour guide for a caverns
Dishwasher in restaurant.
Maintenance at our church
Grocery store clerk.
Trading Post Clerk at Cub Scout Day Camp
My first job was with the local newspaper as a paperboy.
Frammer. Built garages.
Gas station attendant
Working as the porter in a Dunkin’ Donuts shop.
Worked in an electrical supply warehouse as a stock clerk while in college.
After school I worked at a Wheel Horse tractor dealership. I had to prep the tractors for display and delivery. I also was shown how to work on small gas engines.
Working at a super market in my hometown.
Fish Cleaner at Seafood Market
First career was Optical Engineer with Kodak, 1981. First job was Offshore Drill Crew, Gulf of Mexico, which started the day after HS graduation, 1976.
Mowing lawns, raking leaves, shoveling snow, carrying buckets of coal & splitting kindling wood for elderly in my rural neighborhood. This was in my pre-teen years.
Helping my dad in his plumbing and heating business!
Chef’s Assistant, Salad Prep, Dishwasher
Usher at the Byrd Theater
rolling sod and stacking hay on a sod farm
Working for my uncle when I was around 10 during summer months.
pot scrubber at a restaurant (was later promoted to dishwasher).
Bus boy at an all you can eat seafood buffet restaurant
Cutting grass in the neighborhood at at age 8, but first job with a boss, age 13, grounds keeping at a golf course.
Masonry helper, summer job in high school
Page in the House of Delegates
Student IT Help for my school district.
clerk at a tennis club
carrying coal from cellar to living room for elderly woman. I was 11 years old in 1963
“Sandwich artist” At Subway
Grease Monkey, working at my Dad’s auto dealership
My “first summer job” was at the place my father worked, a manufacture of small household furniture (i.e. hassocks, bean bag chairs, etc). They only “hired” me as a favor for my father. They first put me to work making sure all of the sewing machines oil reservoirs didn’t run dry. Then in shipping – mostly to keep me busy/out of the way.
Working at the front desk of a major hotel.
Grocery store bag boy $4.90 per hour
Mowing neighbor’s lawns. Ah, the good old days!
I started mowing lawns around 13 or 14 years old in the neighborhood. First job for a company was CVS pharmacy as a pharmacy technician. I was 16 years old and it was part time. Full time was right out of college 23 years old with Dominion Capital Mortgage as a loan officer.
Working at a gas station as a gas attendant.
First job – McD’s Best non-career job – Valet at Hotel Roanoke
At age 12, I was a “cowboy” on our large family dairy farm. It simply meant I went to bring each of the 4 parts of our large dairy cow herd into the dairy barn for milking. All on foot, no horse. And honestly, it was more ‘cow poke’ than cowboy. But it was awesome to hear at lunchtime, “Who’s cowboy today?” Being cowboy took all afternoon (~4 hrs).
Pulling weeds and maintaining landscaped bed at an apartment complex.
Movie Theater Usher
Mate on a fishing boat
Picking up trash at the high school football stadium.
Military Police office clerk
Oath to uphold the US Constitution
Mom (dad died in WW2)
abusive men in my growing up years
Life’s Lessons Learned
Church Family and Brothers in Christ
Grand parents , parents
Serving in military and in Christianity
Overcoming a disability
How God sees me.
completion of a Christian long-term rehab
My work in the community.
Uncle (Role Model)
Do the right thing no matter what
my Father-example Failure to Honor Women
Involvement with Music & Worship
Learning and Teaching the Bible
Involvement with youth
Men’s ministry leader
Relationships – How I treat others
To be honest what really counts is being a son of God
The gifts (talents) God has given me
Faith. My raising. Sports. Education
Male & Female Mentors- guys like James Dobson
Ministry to Men Leader Local,State and at Times National Level
Do you really know how to SHOW her you love her, not just say it, but SHOW it to her.
How are you pursuing your wife?
Not only ask if he’s stopped watching porn, but ask if he’s still pulling from those videos/ images in his mind and dwelling on them
Who do men never share personal issues with their men friends?
What’s hard in your life right now?
What can I help keep you accountable for?
My wife said, “How do you make sure that your marriage is Christ-centered?”
Do you help your wife in the evening when you get home from work, or do you feel that your workday is finished?
Do you support your spouse and what do you think that means?
What do you do to show your wife that she is special to you?
Is your family currently growing, or do you find yourselves stagnant but appearing to look strong?
To share about his salvation experience.
Do you and your wife pray together? Explain why or why not.
Are you leading your wife, hand to hand, in dedicated and intentional prayer on a daily basis?
What things/strongholds/issues are preventing you from going deeper in your relationship with God, with your wife, with your children, and with your family and friends?
Do you treat your wife with the same patience, respect and courtesy that you extend to others?
What are your tips for being a good husband.
First, my wife would re-write the question. Who are you discipling?
In what ways do you serve your wife as a way to show your love?
What distractions keep you from being the man God designed?
Do you consider what your wife thinks before you make a big decision, financial or otherwise, or does her opinion not carry any weight with you?
What has the Holy Spirit revealed to you about your wife/marriage; how have you used/ moved forward on that revelation?
What boundaries are you setting to leave work at the office?
Have you ‘dated’ your wife lately?
listen first then we talk
What are you doing to prevent lust in your life?
What are you planning for your wife for your anniversary?
How do I find a Spiritual mentor and how do I know I can trust him?
Are you leading your family to read the Bible regularly?
What is the ‘hard stuff’ you’re dealing with right now?
A female recording artist wanting 2 share how God’s healed her from abuse&grief
Facilitating a coed life group
Troubled young adults with bad histories/addictions, etc.
An addict that just needed a friend
My wife and my marriage
I teach Sunday school to men and women 18-25
men in my Celebrate Recovery family who do not attend my church
hopefully my wife!
Senior Adults in my community
Sports officiating Youth – HS.
Grandkids living with us
Ministry to men in addiction singularly and small groups
I help coach football at the high school have them praying before and after ever
I’m a Board Certified Executive Coach
Anyone who will listen.
Pastors in Northern VA
Family – Son-In-Laws
Family in another state
Young men through Instagram messaging
My construction company hiring people who need a second and sometimes third chance
Roommate and friend
Local food bank, Sunday school teacher
Ministry Great Compassion Uganda
one-on-one discipling and USPS evangelism
Family to struggling families
My local church
|I have only had self-study books. I also took basic class in theology at church last year. The men’s group at church that I go to when we were able to meet uses basic 33 men’s study.|
|Master Life by Avery Willis|
|“Brigade Trails” and “Leadership Trails” from Christian Service Brigade Ministries. 🙂|
|We have created a Christian Men’s Fraternity where we hold weekly sessions and progress through lessons in order to develop and disciple men. Then in turn, we train those men to assist with developing the next group.|
|Christian Service Brigade achievement manuals|
|Invited me to a Man in the Mirror “Success That Matters” seminar, and led me thru the 6 week follow up small group|
|The original Men’s Fraternity|
|CBMC Operation Timothy 1984-1986 | CBMC Lifestyle Evangelism Seminar 1985 | CBMC Living Proof 1986-1988|
|Hard work ethic.|
|Men’s Fraternity series and Tony Dungy series|
|Bill Bright handbook for Christian maturity|
|33 Series books.|
|Modern Apologetics writings such as “Case for Christ”, Josh McDowell books, etc.|
|Write a commentary as best as i could of each book in the (Bible) then review it with him. It was not just the Bible the resource was the commentary.|
|Video series…”That the World May Know” by Ray Vanderlan|
|The book “Evidence that Demands a Verdict” by Josh McDowell|
|Billy Graham materials, Navigators Bible, read thru the Bible – 1 year program (done every year since 1977)|
|The 33 series DVD’s and Wild At Heart DVD series|
|Experiencing God by Henry Blackaby|
|Patrick Morley’s book “Man in the Mirror, accountability questions in back of book.|
|Small group study materials (ex: Men’s Fraternity, etc.)|
|Kingdom Man by Dr Tony Evans|
|King James Bible|
|The original MasterLife in the red three-ring binder – very good materials.|
|My wife had written a personal prayer book for me with many of our favorite verses and verses that spoke to the positive victory and blessings that the Lord has provided us|
|Point Man by Steve Farrar|
|Student Discipleship Ministries, Burleson Texas|
|“Becoming a Prayer Warrior” By Elizebeth Alvez|
|“Hosting the Presence” by Bill Johnson|
|My Utmost for His Highest Devotional|
1) Men’s small group study of C.S. Lewis’ Mere Christianity.
2) Men’s fellowship w/table groups of Pr. Robert Lewis’ Quest for Authentic Manhood series.
|Sermon on the Mount by Emmet Fox|
|33 The Series and Men’s Fraternity. The best men’s studies I have ever used!|
|The book 40 days of purpose by Rick Warren|
|Navigator Bible studies on the various books of the Bible, and the Experiencing God study by Blackaby.|
|Most of the men I gravitated too walked their faith and when I approached them, they shared their stories.|
|watching someone Lead by example|
|One To One Discipling (Multiplication Ministries, Vista, CA)|
|None, I made the decision on my own. I have never had anyone sit down and walk me through God’s plan of salvation.|
|Books (like knowing God, hand me another brick, and disciplines of a Godly man). Video series like FamilyLife’s Stepping Up, Podcasts and articles|
|Master Life study|
|Navigators discipleship curriculum|
|Flash Cards. Power Point slides.|
|The Authentic Manhood 33 Series all six books. Also, Tabletalk by Ligonier Ministries.|
|Books from leaders like James Dobson, Gary Smally, Gary Chapman….|
Encouraged me to read…How to win friends & Influence People which led me directly TO the Bible.. the prologue said MANY of the principles had been taken straight from the
|Mentoring His Way by Dr Roy Comstock|
|33 the series, meeting with men in general|
|Christian Men’s Books – Edwin Louis Cole. Christian Financial Resources by Larry Burkett|
|Their commitment and love for God|
|Mainly the Bible.|
|Navigators Scripture Memory|
|Word of Life’s devotional journal booklet.|
|Evangelism Explosion, JD Kennedy “Why I Believe”|
|Personal stories of how others accepted Jesus as their personal savior.|
|Participating in a men’s weekly study group.|
|Berean Bible Collage home study coursework in the mid 1980’s|
|First Fruits of Zion and their many resources. Now the weekly Torah Club, focuses on the Torah Readings and really unpacks that.|
|Many decades ago- Hershel Hobbs “Baptist Faith and Message”. Loved the little book.|
|Intergenerational Discipleship resources developed by Christian Service Brigade|
|It wasn’t a book. It was working side by side with a wise mentor. I was a brand new Christian and new to a church and they were building a parsonage. I was on the roof along with George putting on shingles. That was my classroom time with wise Christian mentors in my new community of believers. Those talk times were priceless.|
|Navigators 2:7 series, D James Kennedy’s Evangelism Explosion, Bill Gothard Seminars, and time with the family of believers!|
|Campus Crusade’s Discipleship series.|
|Praise and worship music. As a musician, being introduced to praising God through music was monumental to me, in growing closer to the Lord. God Bless.|
|several books by various authors, but the best was a notebook my youth pastor put together and helped with spiritual disciplines. another was a book titled “tallyho the fox” by Herb Hodges|
|John Eldridge’s “Wild at Heart”|
|1. Elijah House prayer ministry
2. Devine Design for Discipleship by Chad Craig. DDD is one of the most biblically sound books that just breaks down the word of God and then shows you how to apply it. Elijah House shows you your sins all the way even back to childhood and helps you pray for break through. And then there’s Watchmen Nee, awesome!!
|Student ministry program at our church as a teen and the praise and worship program as a student at the Naval Academy. After the death of my first wife, as a newly married team (Margena and I were both widowed) we lead a class for newlyweds at our church that became a strong fellowship group and we felt God’s leadership in our group.|
|Face to Face Conversation, Fellowship of Christian Athletes, Bible classes/Study, Speakers/Conferences ,Podcasts such as “yours”, Man Up,Man in the Nirroe, Greg Laurie, Joel Osteen, Dr Voddie Baucham, Charles Stanley(In Touch),Daily Devotional(s),Personal Relationship(Orally/listening quietly)with Our Lord.|
|Finding someone to walk with such a mentor or even joining a small men’s group to help you grow and deal with the struggles all of us face.|
|Classes led by my senior pastor.|
|The Men’s Fraternity 33 Series|
|Multiple studies for men.|
|By example. How they lived their lives.|
|Most recently, our pastor used the book, “Disciplines of a Godly Man” by R. Kent Hughes for a discipleship group.|
|Men’s Fraternity then 33 The Series|
|Design for Discipleship by Nav Press|
|Men’s group ministry and men’s retreats were very helpful|
|Consistent contact and social invites. Becoming a friend|
|Prayer, witnessing and serving others.|
|Billy Graham tracts and booklets.|
|Operation Timothy by CBMC Ministry|
|The book “The Measure of a Man” and the ministry of Ed Coles.|
|Time. They gave me their time and poured their life into mine.|
|Discipleship tools. www.iblp.org Training from Institute of Basic Life Principles by Bill Gothard. Basic Life Seminar for 6 evenings, and Saturday July 1993. Then, continued to Study Advance principles Seminar in Sept. 1993. my wife, actually went through the seminar in 1992. Our entire family attended in 1993. videos available.|
|In the mid-80s when I was in the service in Italy our pastor who went to Dallas Theological Seminary. Used overhead view graphs|
|Investing time to disciple and using several books on discipleship|
What Verse or Passage Did You Read Today?
1 chapter of 2 Sam, a Psalm and a chapter of 1 Cor.
Solomon chapter 3
Isaiah chapt 21
The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him. Psalms 28:7 NIV
Reading through the Gospel of Matthew. Matthew 25:1-13
Isaiah 49 and Revelation 19 Using Robert Murray M’Cheyne’s annual reading plan
1 Peter 1:9-12
Nehemiah 10 and 11, and Acts 4
Matthew and proverbs
Haggai 1 ,John 18:19-40 ,1cor.3, deut 1:26-46, ps107:23-43
Job 12, Proverbs 25-26 and Acts 10. Cannot start the day without time with the Lord first before everything else!
Mark 14: 1-9
Psalm 50 and 51
Reading the Bible through in a year chronologically and today I read Proverbs 27-29.
1 Samuel 20.
I read Ephesians chapter 2
Job 14: 1-2; Multiple Psalms chapters, Jeremiah 12, and Romans 12
1 Peter 3:10-22
Song of Solomon 2:15-4:16
With the lockdown I have added a third devotional to my morning reading here are today’s 3:
Psalm 77 and 78 selections
Proverbs 17 (my “Proverb a day”)
Philippians 4:13 For I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me
Revelation 19 and 20
1st Timothy, chapters 4 & 5
1 Corinthians, chapters 5 & 6
The book of Galatians
5:13 Brethren are called into liberty, not as an opportunity for the flesh, but through LOVE serve one another.
Eph 6 and John 3
Exodus 34:5-8, 29-30, Revelation 5:12-14
John chapters 1 and 2
Chapter 1-3 of Hebrews
2 Corinthians 4:7-18
I Kings 17-19
Acts 3 & Nehemiah 7-9
Ruth, chapter 1
1 Kings 2
Ecclesiasties 2: 22 -26
i cor 11
Several, but the one that sticks out is – Be careful for nothing but in everything through prayer and petition with thanksgiving let you request be made known unto God. Phil 4:6
Mark 4, 2 Samual 9&10, Daniel 5
Meditated on Psalm 28:7 for @ 20 minutes.
Technically, I have read my bible within the last 24 hours. I tend to read at the end of my day.
Acts chapter 23-28. I am grateful for Mike’s email note, because i had not read up to that point. God bless you all!
Phil.2:14-15 Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe.
Leviticus 5 / James 4
Ephesians 2:11-22; Acts 12:6-19; and Psalm 89
2 Timothy 2
Ruth, Chapter 1
1 Thes 1, Psalms 117 and Proverbs 21-23
Portions of Ephesians, regarding grace
2 Peter 1
Hebrews 13:15-16, Psalm 119:65-66, Both part of devotionals that i read daily
Psalm 68:4-5 first thing in morning and prayer time. Matthew 9:14-38 for my study.
Psalm 17, Proverbs 17
Since 1977, shortly after I became a Christian, I have read thru the Bible almost every year. Today was the following: 2 Kings 22:1 – 24:20, Psalm 74:18-23, Proverbs 19:3, Acts 2:22-47. I also read Stand Firm. A monthly devotional published by Lifeway for men.
Prov 17, Ps 17,34,51,68,,85,117, 134 & 2 kings 12 & 13
Doing chronological study of the bible. In 2Kings and 2 Chronicles
Mark 12:30’31, Act 27
Neh Chapter 1-4
Psalms 139:23-24, Jeremiah 17:9, I Samuel 24:4-8, I John 1:9, Proverbs 17, Romans 3:23-24
Genesis 15: verse 1 After these things the word of the Lord came to Abram in a vision, saying, Do not be afraid, Abram. [[I am your shield, [a]your exceedingly great reward.]] After recent notification that I need to take an extended hiatus from my job (with no end date in sight) this verse really encouraged me!
Psalm 142. Janes 2
I am doing a chronological study this year. I am currently reading in 2 Kings and 2 chronicle’s after the death of Solomon.
Matthew 11:28-30 (verse of the week for the Every Man a Warrior study I’m in).
Colossians Ch 3
1 Samuel 11:1-11
Psalm 17, 47, 77, 107, 119:129-136, 137; Mark 14:1-9
Matthew 27:45-66 ; Exodus 13-14 (Day 44 of Bible in one year with Nicky Gumbel)
Proverbs 17, 1 Ki 18:1-46, Acts 11:1-30, Ps 135:1-21
1 John 1
Daniel 10 & 11
1 John 4
Prov 18, Psalms 8-13, John 2, James 3
Ephesians 6:1-9; and Galatians 5:1-26
STARTING TO READ PSALMS
PSA. 19:1-2….this was the verse of the day, then I read several more chapters.
Jeremiah 39:1 to 50:46
Charles Bias, Jr.
Dr. Melvin Wells
Mike Young, Sr.
Bishop Gerald O. Glenn
Billy Graham, Chuck Swindol
REV. LARRY ROBINSON
Pastor Bill Motley,
Father Houston was a father to me as a youth.
Gary Young, HS Football Coach, lead FCA at HS
Bill Clemmer (my dad)
Pastor Phillip Mace
Bishop Ernest L. Moore, Jr.
My dad – Doug Jacks
Kenneth L. Clouse (also my earthly Father)
Fred Spivey (deceased), former elder at my church
Dr. Don Forrester
Leo Summers – spiritual mentor.
Pastor Gerald Martin
Deacon Paul Williams
Randy Mc Collum
Now retired Pr. Richard Parke, McLean Bible Church
Pastor John Hershman
My pastor, Dave Spate
Pastors RJ Parrot, and Christopher Parker
John Woodall, Thane & Mark Seager,
Dave Meschke – Navy Chaplain as I served w/ USMC
Earl Pope, Allen Halleck, Kent Spann
Dr. John Gustafson
Pastor Steve Stells, Hope Point Church
Pastor Dwight Jones
Rev Dave Busby
Al Stever – Pastor
Dr. Alvin Francois.
Bishop Joel Nelson
Ken Heaton…Christian mentor, brother, friend
Robert Mansfield Sr, Robert Ruff Jr. Whitney C.
Pastor Stuart Royall
John Wesley Young. Jr.
Pastor Art Remington
Jim Schroeder, passed
John (Bo) Bohannon
Michael D. Hall
Joseph White, James Reed
Pastor Bobby Scott, Pastor Steve Black, Pastor Ross, Mentored and discipled me.
Pastor Drew at Spotswood Baptist
Pastor Dennis Gray, Riva Trace Baptist Church in Annapolis, MD
Pastor Gary Long and Tim Hight, Main Street Baptist Church (now Grace Life) in Christiansburg, VA
Pastor John Bohannon at Water’s Edge Baptist Church in Clarksville, VA
Mr. Todd Massie, of Churchville, VA
Mr. Frank Owens, retired Florida.
Tom Eliff, Ted Tussey, Bill Asbury, Ken Mills, Larry Mason
Jack Hill, former H.S. classmate who has spent career in the Navigators missions organization
Roger Box, former college classmate, now a pastor in the midwest
Russell Joyner, former pastor and bible teacher at West End A.G., Richmond, VA and Redeemer A.G., Goochland, VA
Shawn Stewart, former pastor at Life A.G., Goochland, VA
Doug Watson, current senior pastor at Harvest Renewal Church, Richmond, VA
Rifle Schutte, current teaching pastor at Harvest Renewal Church, Richmond, VA”
“Pastor Kenton Slabaugh
Pastor Richard Landis
Bishop E.W. Jackson, Sr.
Pastor Jason Steffy
Pastor Erie Renno
Pastor Archie Callahan
Pastor Wally Sherbon, Jr.
H C Stafford
Joe Sandidge, Dr Bohanan, Chuck Lawless, Brian Autry, Andy Redford, Mike Young, Art Avent, Charles Maney
Vander Warner Jr.
“1) Childhood friend & retired Anglican priest Eric Cosentino.
2) Former Jews for Jesus missionary Peter Rice.
3) CJFM missionary Larry Dubin.
4) Disciplers Int’l founder/retired US Army chaplain Bart Physioc.
5) Thadd Buzan, former Pentagon Bible Study leader and fellow member, Burke Community Church.”
Maybe YouTube videos from Ravi Zacharias/Francis Chan.
He’s my Pastor and Spiritual Father
My father, Harry Jones, Jr. RIP
Allen M. Bryant
“Our associate pastor, David Friesen
My “”brother””, fitness, and life coach, James JuYong Kim
My ADEPT group: Art, Daniel, Ed, (me), and Thomas
Peter Kwonho Kim, associate pastor of Global Ministries Church in Calgary
Richard Enyimu, my accountability brother
Harry and Herb Maekelburger, who saved me out of my teenage depression.”
Pastor Joseph Owens
Bruce Campbell. Mike Minter, Jamie Jackson, Dan Darby, Dan Kraftson, Hayward Paul, Aubrey Ralph
HOMER B; JIM L.; DAVE G.BRUCE F.’ FRANK W.; DEAN R. ; JON P.; MIKE C.; DAVE L. ; BOB MC.; DALE J.
Shannon Harris, Greg Flowers, Jeremy Phillips, Remi Sojka, Jon Heaps, Garth Landis, Jesus Christ
Pastor Derik Jones
Garth Rosselll, the former dean of Gordon Conwell seminary who mentored me for more than two years
Charles Tapp Sr.
Rev. George E. Davis
Rev. Brian Frost
Rev. Charles Young
Dr R Paul Caudle
Rev Andy Goode
Rev Dick Bailey
Dr Rick Sharkey
Rev Steve Bradshaw
Dr David Medley
Pastor Fred Wyatt III
Bishop Wellington Boone
Pastor Stedman Reis
Pastor Albert Walker Jr.(Sr.)
Pastor Doug McMurry
Pastor Tim Kurtz
Brian Autry, Derek Futrell, Chuck Lawless, Stan Harrison
Pastor Don Coleman
Chaplain Carl Hawkins
My dad, Richard Harrison
My brother, Steve Harrison
Pastor Jerry Amstutz
Bible teacher, Dan Korver
Medical Dr. Gil Fisher
Pastor Bill Branch
Pastor Johnny Hunt
GRANTLEY MARTELLY Dave Iverson Ray Carson Guy Hood Pastor Art Remington Pastor Dave Springer Pastor Zig Krueger
Pastor Felix Cheif
Rev. Theodore Edwards
John McBride McChesney Jr.
Robert Smith (dad)
Bill Steele III
T.D. Jakes (Indirectly; Though he doesn’t know)
Frank C. Weiss
Bishop Daniel Robertson
Edgar E Bradley
Mike Young, Paul Chipman II, Allan Chipman, Mark-Anthony Chipman, Dr. Hayward Robinson, Pastor Hal Johnson and Barry Desaw, Dr. Martin Hawkins and Dr. Tony Evans, and George Floyd
Edgar E Bradley
Eugene E Bradley
Forest Shelton Fairley
The Men of Choice Baptist Church
Alirio N (parent)
Pastor Jeff Williams
Pastor Leon Edgman
Pastor Brian Hughes
Dr. Alton Butler
Dr. Geoff Hammond
Steven Furtick (Indirectly; Though he doesn’t know)
Michael Todd (Indirectly; Though he doesn’t know)
Louie Giglio (Indirectly; Though he doesn’t know)
David Jeremiah (Indirectly; Though he doesn’t know)
Charles Stanley (Indirectly; Though he doesn’t know)
Craig Groeschel (Indirectly; Though he doesn’t know)
Ravi Zacharias (Indirectly; Though he doesn’t know)
Francis Chan (Indirectly; Though he doesn’t know)
1599 Geneva Bible
CEV – Contemporary English Version (2)
Christian Standard Bible (6)
Chronological Bible NIV
ESV but also NIV prior to 1986
New King James (44)
New Revised Standard Version
NIV, NLT, KJV
NKJV AND NASB equally often.
RSV – Revised Standard Version (2)
The Good News Bible
the new testament in modern English
The Passion Translation and Amplified
Covenant Eyes and ‘Wise Guys’ group.
Wife knows all passwords and is welcome in all my accounts and to use my phone or laptop at any time
My wife has all the passwords and I have incredibly limited access
Hard thing to do
At the moment i do not have any software on my phone, tablet or laptop. After being saved over 11 years ago and making lifestyle changes as i quickly grew spiritually, i rely on my faith and understanding of what God requires. Whenever i feel any slip or pending attach i turn back to God in prayer and discipline.
Don’t look. Also after 60 years old….
I have used Covenant Eyes for over 15 years. I also have 3 men who hold me accountable weekly.
we have all of each others passwords and sometimes sit and do online things together including looking at history to see if there is anything we need to revisit or unsubscribe to …..try not to have ANY secrets when it comes to accountability.
If soft porn/crazy pics show up I immediately try to think about the scars I have from the past and the desire not to add to them. That accompanied by the thought that Jesus is better helps a lot!
Use Christianihomepage only with no ads. Open door policy when online.
Use covenant eyes on the computer which is also in an area my wife can see. Also in community with other men where we can share struggles.
Pray before I go on line. When I know the site is bad don’t go.if i arrive at a sit that is bad turn away from it and leave. flag the sites as bad and tell others.
I have a filter, Picture of my family on the computer and phone, I don’t use anyone else’s devices
work has a scene in place and I let anyone check my history
Grab my bible or something devotional like.
This fits into my online “security” strategy – I quickly review superficial data in emails (the “tells”) and web site come-on’s to assess the risks of opening the email or web link. In my world, I assume that anything with sexual connotations in the subject lines, photos, or captions is likely to be unhealthily stimulating at best and ponographic at worst, and perhaps even dangerous to my computer’s security. Therefore, I don’t click on those — I leave the page or delete the email.
How about a system were internet access was defaulted to No access instead of free access. An individual must request access and go on public record that access to porn has been requested, verified and granted. I am willing to bet there would be dramatic decrease. However, this is not want people want
have a brother look at what you browse and be held accountable,
What would Jesus do?
My wife has complete access to my computer and phone with all passwords.
I have Covenant Eyes and/or Ever Accountable on all my devices. I am active in a Pure Desire group. I have developed an Escape Plan and a Recovery Action Plan.
Have a an accountability partner to check on you; daily if needed. Just click away when porn teasers come on a screen. Pray for the women in the porn teasers and ask that they come to know Christ. You cannot want to see a woman naked when you are praying for her.
I am not tempted in this area.
Holy Spirit of GOD & my computer is in my bedroom and my wife also shares it!
I avoid any pop-ups that appear potentially attractive or provocative. Also I don’t visit websites that I shouldn’t be visiting!
My wife has access to all my phone and computers and is encouraged to review my texts, emails, and internet history.
The Holy Spirit. You don’t play in the dirt without getting it on you. You develop a taste for evil, unhealthy things. Porn is like the most addictive drug, much more powerful than tobacco, and alcohol. It will destroy the intimate relationship with a spouse or one you hope to have. It’s not worth the grief in will cause you, and the loss of relationship with Jesus. Run from it!
Men who have my permission to ask at any time.
Practical advice to myself. Be accountable to someone trustworthy. Isolation in our modern culture is just not enough to protect myself from online temptation. There is a direct correlation between how much time I spend reading my bible, and my ability and willingness to resist temptation. Scripture reading and meditation on the Word of God is the only effective way to Let the Word of God dwell in you richly. My purity is dependent on this personal devotion. Truth is a value.
Repentence (mentinoa) – having a change of mind in what sin is and who God is.
Somewhat of a system. As things pop-up, delete the ads, and or emails immediately. Some ads and such you can stop showing up, by marking them.
I am part of a men’s group where we have accountability partners
But I do not look at any sites that start off with a picture of a female regardless of what it says.
I do have an internet filter for objectionable links that won’t load the site unless the filter is overridden
We use covenant eyes
Stay in the word. Read the word, meditation on the word and live the word.
Use Covenant Eyes software with a partner
I do have an accountability partner and have him to notify if I am drawn in
I have an accountability partner I contact if drawn in
My wife has access to my phone and computer as well as access to my email but that isn’t really a good strategy. Our pastor has a better one. Everyone in his household has parental controls on their devices so his wife can monitor his activities.
I trust in Jesus
I feel I don’t need one as I hate pornography of any kind…
I know great things about Covenant Eyes but due to circumstances and workplace policies, it doesn’t work for me. I have relational accountability with a handful of friends, varying levels of frequency and depth of conversation, with my wife, and have learned a lot and developed a strategy with my church’s Biblical Counselor. For me, online prevention is a way to prevent external acts of sin. So my wife and I have developed lots of logistics on how/when I use the computer at home.
Covenant Eyes is AWESOME! (Also a DNS which does not allow filth to come through) Lastly – Disney Circle at times.
Covenant Eyes – pluses – it is easy to squire and use. ONE caveat – without strong diligent partners seeing and giving a serious review of a report it is rendered unreliable and in some cases useless. after review if doubt is there make the call to the person you hold accountable. that is the only way CE is truly online accountability.
Still doing face to face
Filter on the search engine.
Stay in the word of God-the Bible. I believe God has the best plan for our sexuality and has our best interests in mind. I stay away from any questionable online activity, and avoid any “I’m curious” roaming. I don’t click on links I’m not familiar with- I don’t take the “click bait.” I immediately reject friend requests in Facebook from women I don’t know, and who has no common friends.
Ever Accountable and my group of guys in Samson who keep me accountable. Stay off computer when I’m alone. Call a friend if I’m going to be home alone.
Scanner – I still hear about it from her and the kids.
Chocolates…it gives her a migraine…who knew?
Pillows for the sofa in the family room. She’s never let me forget what a bad idea that was. I’m scarred.
A mop/vac for the kitchen. I was young and dumb.
A basket filled with an assortment of flours (not a misspelling)…bleached, enriched, whole wheat, etc. I told the cashier of my plan when I bought them and she said “I hope you have a backup plan”!I definitely thought more of the idea than my wife did.
a kitchen utensil
I did not give my wife an apple watch because I was thinking about the high price only, but I had an apple watch.
When we just got married 44 years ago I gave cooking utensil gifts couple times & she did not like- inferring she needed to cook more //now she loves cooking gifts // funny!
Anything she says she likes but when I buy it for her she says I did not say I wanted it.
A computer game – a Star Wars computer game.
A Stair Stepper
Pots and pans at our very first Christmas together. (BTW – that gift is much better after many years together!)
Hedge trimmer – 36 inches long. Ended up being her favorite gardening tool. From worst to first Christmas to May shrubs!
Not being attentive to her needs!
A set of real pearls when she was one week late with our second child. We could not really afford them and she was in a foul mood because the baby was late so she made me take them back. No good deed goes unpunished!
Anti-freeze recovery kit for car
I bought a ladder that I then used to repair the house.
A bowflex machine for Mother’s Day
Any gift. My wife wants to buy her own things.
An Iron, so she could do my shirts after she starched my collars… Have repented and asked fogiveness since…and have made restitution many time over the 47 years this December..I’m sooooo Blessed!!!
Nothing at all because she said, don’t get me anything! Why did I listen to that suggestion!
mixer. it didn’t go over well.
A sweatshirt that I forgot was a gift and she found it two years later still in the shopping bag…
I’m sure that somewhere along the way I gave her an appliance that probably didn’t get a great reaction. Worse are times when I probably should have given a gift and didn’t. I am thinking of giving her a set of men’s golf clubs with the rationale that I know how much joy she will get from seeing how much I enjoy them. What do you think?
I believe it was a mixer or some other appliance. It was so long ago I have forgotten :-)!
One Christmas I did a last-minute shopping run and got her a dress that really wasn’t her style. She tried to be excited about it but couldn’t make it happen. She was very gracious though.
Her engagement ring while saying, “So, you going to marry me?” As she was walking to the bathroom. Still have not made up for it.
Really crappy used car.
Something to use around the house. Vacuum cleaner ect.
A new blender.
I jogged my wife’s memory and she reminded me that the precious gift was two over sized fleece shirts given to her in the first two years of our 30 year marriage. Apparently she managed to communicate her displeasure at the time as I’ve gotten better since then.
(Sorry, wife here) He’s never given me a bad gift! Thoughtful and generous – flowers, candy, dinner, and two cards (one serious & one funny).
nothn one time! & flowers one time wen she was mad at me. Both while a was unSaved!
Some not so nice flowers
One year my wife and I decided to not exchange gifts for Christmas. We both upheld the agreement and it was the worst feeling in the world. I am a giver! I vowed that day that it would never happen again. She doesn’t have to gift me anything and I will be fine but, I will always gift her something.
No such thing. No matter what, Rita is a great present opener. I, on the other hand, not so much. The best present I ever gave Rita was replacing an old light fixture she had been hating for years. I wrapped up a lighting fixture catalog and said “Take your pick.”
One year I put together a very large basket of items ALL from the Dollar Store. It was all good stuff that she used, but that did not really matter.
I have never giving my wife a bad gift. 🙂 I did give her a picture of a dishwasher one time that she wanted and never got it for her. The best gift I give her, is me and I give that to her every year.
The same perfume that my ex-girlfriend used to wear.
I would always make a nice Sunday dinner for both my mother & mother-in-law on Mother’s Day. Then usually was too tired to enjoy the day myself. So one year when the kids were young they helped my husband plan a fancy picnic in the park for all of us. So all the moms had a nice lunch I didn’t have to work hard!!
The birth of my son.
I came home from a weekend away and found my son as he had just finished weeding, planted some flowers and mulched my front flower beds. I was so grateful for his time and thoughtfulness.
The most memorable Mother’s Day gift I ever received was last year. It was a beautiful bracelet from one of my “daughters” that read: You didn’t give me life. . . life gave me you. Love, Jennifer – My heart was full of love and joy!
A beautiful wooden bluebird house with a tin roof, handmade by my kids and husband. As much as I love the bird house, the real gift to me is the time and lessons given to my kids from my husband who has adopted them as his own.
Love my kids fixing lunch each year on Mother’s Day, best gift ever!!
Our daughter is a professional artist, and when she was a senior in high school she did a beautiful pen & ink drawing of a Momma bird in a nest watching as the baby bird leaves the nest. She gave that to me for Mother’s Day and I’ve treasured it.
Spend time with family being together no spending any money
Our second child was born on Mother’s Day!
Picnic lunch with my kids and husband…(because I didn’t have to plan or make the meal) HEEHEE!!!
My husband fixing a homemade meal, eating dinner together as a family, cleaning up the kitchen and going for a walk with me. Second best was buying a plane ticket for me to visit my family in another state.
Handmade cards & family time together
I know this sounds predictable, but last year, having my daughter and granddaughter here at our home was the best gift! (They serve on the mission field in Papua New Guinea!)
Homemade box with fingerprint flowers on the lid. Love all my homemade items.
My husband was working overseas in Europe and had heard about a pretty pink bike that I was going to look at, he woke up 6 time zones early, called the bike shop and when I walked in the door they had it gifted and presented to me in front of the whole store telling the story of the lengths he went to surprise me! I felt so special!!
Husband and daughter making me breakfast in bed and cleaning the house for me while I relaxed and did NOTHING. 🙂
Skydiving trip from my children.
A beautiful hanging basket and a watering can. I used that can for at least 20 years and smiled every time, remembering how excited my young children were when they gave it to me.
Being a mom for a short 6 years, I would say my first gift of a necklace with my child’s birth stone. I do value now that my husband takes our boys shopping for something for me.
Pedicure and manicure
A picnic in my favorite park, and I didn’t think about 1 single detail!
My family taking me to see the new Marvel movie
the kids put together two flower pots with a variety of flowers for my front porch.
Taking me to eat my favorite meal- seafood!
A potted flower from my daughter.
not a bought gift but my first child born a week before Mother’s day in 1997
My little girl was born in mid-March, making her my best Mother’s day gift. I guess the most memorable thing is a ceramic watering “can”, about 31 years ago, which I still use.
Time…spent with my family enjoying each other laughing and encouraging and loving each other…time spent glorifying God by giving Him thanks for life and the beauty of Creation…acknowledging His love through our love for each other
Hand-written letter from son & husband
Activities with my family like visiting Luray Caverns or having a game night
A heartfelt note from my daughter.
Once I was really sick over Mother’s Day. I couldn’t even get to church and Chris not only took care of me, but also brought me flowers too. It was his care that made an impression on me.
Going to the Viking Festival. We have gone the past two years. Now due to COVID 19 we can’t go this year.
The gift of life. The one who made me a mother
Breakfast in bed served by my children.
I received a handwritten, original, poem written about love
A day with the family participating in everything I love (hike or walk, gardening, boating, starting & finishing a special project) a day where I see their intentional efforts to give of themselves.
A song written by my eight year old daughter.
My daughter and I had a relaxing B&B weekend just kicking back and doing things we like to do.
YES = 83% NO = 17%
All the kids are out of the house, I am a single empty nester!!!
We love “Phase 10” card game.
Just one? Ticket to Ride or Colt express
Cards….Hand n’ Foot is a family favorite
rummikub with my wife – and as of now our COVID-19 challenge has me in the lead 9 – 8 woo-hoo
500 Rummy Trivia Crack
Carcasonne. Board game. Build cities, roads, fields. Take them over to earn points. Lasts about 40 minutes. My boys love it.
Uno card game
Tenzi (with card expansion pack)
Cards and board games
Wii Sports (bowling)
With no one else in the empty nest but me and my hot girlfriend of 40 + years I really can’t share those games with you!
It depends on which games they are playing.
Sorry, Uno and Battle Ships.
Family time is a must in developing a strong family unit
Ticket to Ride & Cards (all kinds of games) are our favorites.
Board games (Clue), video games, etc
Settlers of Catan
We have been playing the card game, Hand and Foot
Mexican train dominos
Settlers of Catan Hanabi Century: Spice Road, Catan, Dominion, etc. Hard to name one.
We various card games such as spades, bid whist, Board games such as monopoly, sorry, etc. Also play chess, checkers, backgammon
Any card games, Monopoly, life
yes, checkers, dominoes, cards
I like playing UNO with the kids and Banana grams with my wife
hide and go seek.
We play GaGa Ball!
Mexican Train (a dominoes game)
Card game, called hand and foot
Card games and some board games.
Blokus, Chess, Dominies and card games
Phase 10 is the wife’s and childrens’
Unfortunately I didn’t play many games when my my son was younger. My wife’s family played games growing up but mine did not. I’ve enjoyed playing Life, snakes and ladders, and most simple games and puzzles
Uno! We adjusted the rules to what we call cut throat Uno. Basically all the skips, reverses and draw two cards can b added until someone doesn’t have one.
Yes I play Monopoly with my 17 year old son he loves it and I love it that’s about the only time we get to spend together
Ticket to Ride, Qwirkle, Golf(card game), Wildlife Bingo, Pitch (card game)
Lots of card games. Spades is one of my favorites. I can remember playing Set Back with my grandfather 40 years ago.
Settlers of Catan
Ticket to ride
Started playing video games with my teenage boys.
Scavenger hunt with my grandson
Uno, Scamble, horse play
We like to play “Clue”
Quelf is a game we enjoy as a family. Lots of laughs.
Qwerkle, It is easy enough kids pick it up and challenging enough for the adults want to keep having a rematch.
Sorry, We added special cards to the deck to make the game more lively.
Axis & Allies Board Game
Daddy Grilled Cheese Sandwiches!
“From scratch” pizza. Every Friday night. Top it off with “from scratch” biscotti.
Steak (particularly Porterhouse)for sure!
Grilled salmon, turkey burgers, and marinated chicken.
Steak on the grill with hickory wood smoke. Medium to medium rare. Porterhouse, t-bone, or ribeye steaks.
Steak on the grill.
I do several things well, but i’d have to say my mesquite-marinaded, charcoal-mesquite wood smoked, barbecue chicken breasts.
Barbecued boneless chicken breasts (on the grill), corn on the cob, salt potatoes and strawberry shortcake for dessert.
Boston butt on the rotisserie/grill
Italian dressing marinade bbq grilled chicken
Either something grilled or scrambled eggs with lots of fixins.
Grilled shrimp with angel hair pasta (ingredients include: garlic (lots!), olive oil (lots!), fresh basil, fresh parsley, arugula, crushed red pepper, coarse-ground black pepper, white wine)
Reservations! Haha Meat on the grill
I would say smoke bbq ribs
Rice and beans casserole
Pancakes w/crispy smoked bacon or Canadian bacon. The pancake recipe came from my freshman year dorm cook — who had just come back from a tour in Vietnam and was trained by the Army.
Steak Dianne – tableside.
Breakfast-scrambled eggs, bacon, sausage, oatmeal, fresh fruit and coffee.
Pork Butt BBQ over Charcoal Grill
Salmon steaks on the outdoor grill
Burgers & home cut fries!
Pork and sauerkraut in a crockpot with some potatoes. Super easy and simple but really amazing. Of course, learnt it from my mom.
Florentine omelette or Omelettes in general
Smoked pull pork bbq
Ham and bean soup!!!
Ham and bean soup
Breakfast. Who says you can’t have breakfast for dinner?
My wife always asked for friend venison on her birthday and our anniversary. While it’s not the healthiest way to cook it we sure do enjoy some marinated deer steaks friend golden brown.
Shrimp scampi, a green salad, and Cheesecake with strawberries for dessert
7-Layer Bean Dip
My signature meal is steak with potato and veggies, steak medium well, baked potato and red and green veggies,
Steak on the grill bake potato and salad
tacos, rice, & beans
Burgers in the grill.
Breakfast: Western Omelet and Cheese Grits Lunch: A Mediterranean Turkey Sandwich Supper: Grilled Salmon
Imitation Chick-fil-a sandwiches from scratch.
Grilled steak/chicken with peppers
Steak and baked potatoes of course. Salad only if I have to.
Grilled pork tenderloin
Nelson’s Golden-Glow style barbecued chicken
T bone steak, steamed broccoli, sweet potato, strawberry salad, cherry pie with vanilla ice cream
I don’t cook.
Cedar Plank Salmon
My daughter said something with the BBQ
Pancakes from scratch. Virginia Hospitality Cookbook recipe! It is da bomb!
Whole Tri-Tip roasted over wood with grilled potatoes/peppers.
A hodgepodge of leftovers all mixed together.
Grilled steak and sides.
I do most of the cooking for our family because it’s easier on my wife who is a nurse and usually has crazier schedules than her pastor husband (LOL). But, if I had to pick a “signature meal”, I guess it would be a simple ground beef and rice skillet dish with vegetables on the side — it’s quick, easy, & the kids love it.
pumpkin pie and Thanksgiving dinner
Chicken baked in soup broth with veggies over rice…
Rice and beans
filet mignon, baked potato & asparagus
Fried chicken, mashed potatoes and green beans.
Smoked meat and pinto beans.
Teriyaki flank steak, rice, and braised celery almandine.
Chicken Picata served over fresh baby spinach with brown rice cooked in half chicken stock and half Chardonnay (aged at least 6 years)seasoned with taragon and thyme.
Breakfast! Eggs and a variety of other meats in various ways.
Anything on the grill!
Discada – Mexican dish
Boxed cake mixes! Got to have a few sweets Once in awhile
Applewood Smoked Boston Butt (aka pulled pork)
ROASTING A TURKEY
Smoked Boston Butt (bring on the BBQ), Alao Pizza on the grill (Chicken, Bacon Ranch)
Pan Fried Rainbow Trout w/asparagus and salad
Oatmeal slow cooked with milk not water, almonds not cooked in oil, flax seed or chia seeds, cinnamon, fruit of all types, tablespoon of greek yogurt. I gift this for “my bride” of 44 years each morning with hot coffee.
Hamburgers on the grille
Marconi and cheese, Bake beans, Buttered broccoli, Deep fried crispy chicken, Apple Pie topped with whip cream, Water
Protein pancakes, eggs and bacon.
Steaks on the grill
Wild caught salmon with glaze.
Pulled Pork with a side of my homemade potato salad!
Don’t cook I burn/ The grill is my thing.
Tuna Fish casserole
Filet mignon, green beans, and sweet potato
Country ham, sweet potatoes, and baby limas
Meat loaf, mash potatoes and green beans.
Tomato soup and a grilled cheese sandwich!
breakfast omelet. 2 eggs, Crumbled bacon, cheddar cheese, diced onions and peppers, salsa.
Beans and franks.
Baked tilapia fillets with parmesan cheese and other ingredients.
Steak and potatoes
Smoke baby back ribs
Charcoal grilled hamburgers
Wings on the grill with home made French fries
Cabbage and greens
I make a mean southwest corn salad, I grill amazing ribs and steaks. My spaghetti squash spaghetti is also on point.
Things from my smoker or the grill.
Steak 2bake potatoes and salad
Breakfast, authentic swedish crapes, home made thick burgers. I know you asked for one it would be my farm fresh breakfast
Growing up in Louisiana, we had Gumbo every Christmas Eve. I have carried on the tradition and would have to say that it would be Gumbo.
I make a mean chili. Ground beef, dark red kidney beans, crushed tomatoes, chopped green peppers, and spices. I usually make a big pot to last several meals.
Casserole, Italian style
Ribeye steak with baked potato, baked beans, and corn on the cob. Steak and corn cooked on the grill
an egg dish
Lobster and Steak with fixin’s.
Smoke butt !! It is awesome !!!
Anything on the grill!
Grilled filet mignon
3 course meal… 1. Hot Dogs 2. Macaroni 3. And Cheese… Christmas-Strawberry Crepes!!!!!!!
Flat iron steak mushrooms and onions.
Beer can chicken on the grill!
Ribeye steaks on the pellet grill
Striper nuggets, I cut up chunks of Striped Bass or Rock fish and fry them
Grilled pork ribs
Start with placing tin foiled low flat pan on grill , pieces of steak, onions, green and red peppers, sausage links cut up in pieces, red eye potatoes, baby corn, squash , small carrots, shrimp , 1 stick of butter, some hot powder lightly sprinkled ,, cook low temp for about 1 1/2 hours ,, turn every 15 minutes,, can pile it up as cooking, enjoy
Chicken curry sauce over rice.
Pickled Chicken on the grill!!! Yum Yum!!!
My one special meal is pasta with ground turkey. It’s almost like hamburger helper but made from scratch.
Chili with 3 kinds of beans
Turkey,vegetable macaroni with four different cheese and homemade tomato sauce
Steak and baked potato
Home made spaghetti sauce.