My vision for the local church is that every man would be connected with other men who know him well, who call him out, and who he would call in a crisis situation

Can you say this about yourself? Think about it – how many times in your life would it have helped to be able to pick up the phone and talk to a trusted brother to gain wisdom for a situation in your life? I know for me, relationships with the “Wise Guys” in my life have been key. My small group formed over 15 years ago, and with time and effort, it has developed into a true iron-sharpening-iron alliance. 

What’s the Big Deal about Small Group? 

Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken.” Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 

We often see this scripture used in the context of marriage, but it applies to the value of men’s relationships as well. We don’t see a society conducive to men developing godly relationships with one another, and as a result, we can end up operating in Lone Ranger mode. The scripture is clear here that aloneness can be to our detriment. 

  1. Woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up.”  
    We need to connect with men who will lift us up and who we can lift up. It doesn’t need to be a formal Bible study or even church-affiliated. Form a band of Christian brothers that will walk through life with you. It may take some time for a group to form, gel, and shake out who will be committed for the long-term, but just start. It doesn’t matter what you call it, as long as the goal is to sharpen and encourage one another in your faith walk. It’s that simple. 
  1. “Two are better than one.”  
    Men, this is what we need, brothers we have life-on-life experience with who can help us withstand the challenges of life. Have at least 3-5 guys there. You want to hear from every man every time you meet. Every man needs the opportunity to hear and be heard. Everyone communicates, no one dominates. 
  1. Two can withstand what one cannot.”  
    We all face challenges or difficulties, and an effective small group is a place where each man knows he can be open with what is happening in his life and that his privacy will be respected. Implementing the “Vegas Rules,” what happens in small group stays in small group, gives assurance that each guy can be honest about what he needs help to withstand. 
  1. A threefold cord is not quickly broken.”  
    There is power in numbers, and our ultimate strength comes from unity with Christ. Source truth from the Bible. Always go back to the scriptures to gain perspective on every situation in life. 

So How do You Get Going? 

It might look like gathering a couple of guys for coffee one morning a week. It might look like joining an open group at your church. Be intentional about getting around godly men regularly and keep the conversation holy, healthy, and helpful.  

Don’t get distracted by the “N’s” – NFL, NCAA, Nasdaq, NOAA . . . you get the picture. Those are things you can talk about anytime. Use your time intentionally to spur one another on in your relationships with the Lord.  

Study a book of the Bible or go through a book to gain some momentum. Two of my favorites are Point Man: How a Man Can Lead His Family by Steve Farrar and The Man in the Mirror by Patrick Morely. 

My hope is that every man would be connected to other men who will help him walk with Christ and lead his family well. Take action today, and check out Noble Warriors resources here for ideas on leading and launching effective small groups. It may take time, but it is necessary and worth the effort.